腫瘤縮小了!!

五月二十九日起爸爸開始接受化療，兩次的療程之後，這是第一次的療程評估。七月六日是預約要回診看電腦斷層掃描報告的日子，我請了假回高雄家，陪著爸爸一起去醫院。

Papa has undertaken two times of chemotherapy since May 29. I went back to Kaohsiung on Thursday night (July 5) for it would be the first time on Friday (July 6) to see whether the chemotherapy has effect on the tumor masses in Papa's chest. I would accompany Papa to the pulmonary medicine clinics and know the result at the same time.

當我從電腦螢幕上，看到爸爸於五月二十九日開始化療之前的胸腔斷層影像時，心裡的震驚真是難以形容！不過就短短一個月的時間，一開始確診為肺癌時的腫瘤，已從三公分左右的大小迅速增大至四點六公分！難以想像如果不是大姊夫的奔走，化療真的晚一個月才開始，爸爸的病情恐怕會有極大的變化！

I was shocked when Dr. M.C. Lin showed me the chest CT scan taken at the day before the first time of chemotherapy! The tumor masses was obviously larger than the ones I had seen at April 26 -- the biggest one was in a diameter of 2.6 cm and it increased to 4.6 cm during a month! I felt a shiver down my spine and imagined if Papa had the first chemotherapy at June 29 instead of May 29, what terrible things would happened to Papa!

化療後的結果終於要揭曉了。透過電腦螢幕，腫瘤的影像清晰地呈現在我眼前。七月五日的胸部斷層影像，左肺上方及右肺下方接近橫隔膜的兩個腫瘤團塊都明顯縮小了！相較於開始化療之前的影像，最大的腫瘤團塊已縮小到少於四公分！

The effects of chemotherapy was then showed in front of my eyes. From the computer screen, I saw the tumor masses clearly. As they were examined by CT scan at July 5, two of them was significantly decreased in size than they were at May 29 -- from 4.6 cm to less than 4.0 cm in diameter.

但是，位於胸腔中央淋巴結上的腫瘤看起來並沒有太明顯的變化。這個腫瘤團塊其實就是當初讓爸爸失聲的主要原因，因為它壓迫到返喉神經，阻斷了神經傳導，以致於左邊聲帶漸漸萎縮，最後爸爸因為失聲而就診。林醫師跟我們說，因為淋巴結的血管分布較少，化療的藥物又是透過血管送到全身各處，淋巴結可能因為藥物尚未到達有效劑量，所以這個位置的腫瘤團塊看起來變化不大，建議我們等下一階段療程結束，看情況如何再討論。

The one which located on the lymph node of the central region in the chest and was the main cause of Papa's sound-lost symptom seemed no obvious change after the first chemotherapy. It was this tumor mass that blocked the signaling of recurrent laryngeal nerves to the vocal cords and led to Papa's lost of sounds. I felt worried of it. Dr. Lin said the drugs of chemotherapy were delivered by blood vessels and the tumor mass of the lymph node might be affected much slowly for lymph node had less blood vessels.

是啊！我太急了，爸爸曾經說過這是個要與之長期對抗的慢性病，我不該這麼沒有耐心才是。這一次的檢查結果真是令人感到精神為之一振！腫瘤沒有持續增大，對全家人來說是天大的好消息。化療的副作用漸漸出現了，心疼爸爸必須忍受這些折磨，不知該對爸爸說些什麼安慰的話，爸爸卻反過來安慰我，這些都是進行化療必經的過程，不管多麼不舒服或難堪，都是要面對的事實。

Yes, we should be more patient for this situation. We indeed were encouraged by the results of chemotherapy and felt happy about the regression of tumor masses. The side effects of chemotherapy happened to Papa gradually, yet Papa said that's what he has to confront no matter how unpleasant it would be.

親愛的爸爸，我知道你說的這些話都是為了讓我們不要太擔心。身為子女的我，多麼希望可以為您承受這些病痛的折磨，然而現實的情況卻是，什麼事都幫不上忙，又住在遙遠的北台灣，無法陪在您的身旁．．．我唯一能做的就是把自己的身體跟家庭照顧好，讓爸爸可以專心對抗病魔，不用為我的事掛心吧～

Dear Papa, I knew what you said was just comforting words to erase my worries. I wish it were me to suffer from the pains...I am so sorry I did nothing and live far away from you...Yes, I promise you I will be more brave as Papa's expectation to face those unpredictable future and consequences.